This is not a movie review about It Takes a Man and a Woman.
It is more of a life review. That’s
exactly how I felt while viewing this gem of a movie. I can relate with it
through and true. I am more of a Miggy than Laida Version 2.0. No, I am not a
part of a large family conglomerate. No, I don’t run a publication (this one I
really wish). No, I am not about to lose
everything I possess and cherish. But yes, like Miggy, I have been to worst.
Like Miggy, I lost my parents. In my case, I lost mine
even they were still alive. I love my Mom so much. She was, as the song went,
the wind beneath my wings. All throughout, we lived in the same house. We ate
breakfast together. We watched soap operas together. We also faced gargantuan
financial problems together. But I
drifted away. I rebelled not against her but to the huge responsibilities I had
to carry. I just thought every time we spoke, she would ask me to pay for this
and that. I was paying bills, I was giving money, but I was also running away
from Mama. I regretted that. I hated myself for that. And yes, I carried for
years that heavy burden of guilt.
Like Miggy, I looked up to my Papa. Yes, you read it
right. I looked up to him. How many times I wished I could really reach out to
a father figure, I mean, to him. I looked up to him and wished that he would
really play father to me. I hated him for most of my life. My parents got
separated and hated my father more because of that. I had to carry what he
should be providing.
This is the reason why I cried during that scene when
Laida’s mother (played by the underrated but always reliable Irma Adlawan)
talked about forgiveness and love. It was like my mother talking. How she
decided to let go of my father. How she decided to forgive my father after. How
she asked me learn to forgive myself and to forgive others including my father.
How she asked me to choose to love, whatever it takes, whatever happens.
This is the reason why I cried when Laida and her father
(superbly played by Al Tantay) readily forgave each other. As they say, healing
takes time. In my case, healing happened after death. I regretted that I was
not able to take care of my father on his last days. I regretted that there was
still resentment when he died. I was not even allowed to go to his funeral. I
chose to stay away (my brothers went on). Call me a bad son; I felt I deserve
that tag. But please forgive me too for being one. It took time. It took a long
process. I won’t go through details here but I was in shambles. Like Miggy, I faced
the worst. And it took a decision to set things right again: the decision to
forgive, the decision to love myself.
You have probably noticed that the scenes I cited above
involved Laida and not Miggy. Stiil, I am more of a Miggy. Over-achiever but
more of a failure, go-getter but left empty handed most of the time, driven to be the
best and came out worst. Like Miggy, I worked hard to prove myself to my
family and to the whole universe. Like Miggy, I tried hard to be strong and unaffected and at some point,
unattached. And like Miggy, all I wanted is to love and be loved. All I wanted
is to forgive and be forgiven. And I realized, after watching this movie, all I want
really is to be a good person.
This is the reason why I had to stand up in the middle
of that killer-speech of Miggy’s Dad (the veteran and always perfect Dante
Rivero). I remembered my own father. I mirrored my own life. I reflected on my
own struggle. I cried in one dark corner of the cinema flashing back my life on
my own big screen.
I am Tonichi Version 2.0, not a better one, no longer
striving to be the best; all I want is to be a good person.
Note: Thank you JLC.
