Tuesday, July 15, 2014


I am turning 47 in September. And I never had a boyfriend since birth.

I am stating it as a matter-of-fact, not a whine or a complaint, not a gripe or as a wish.I just thought of saying it and putting on  paper (figuratively and on digital space).

Actually, I didn't mind. I don't really mind. But suddenly I felt this thing --- not longing, not regretting, not feeling lonely or something --- just this thing I cannot really describe. Again, I am not sad for never having a boyfriend or for passing up on the chances to have one. It is just that...

I think I better tell you the truth.

Two occasions. One, birthday. Aki, a guy friend suddenly popped this to my face: Hindi ka ba naiinggit? Marami siyang kaibigang lalaki, kasi nagpapainom siya, kaya lagi siyang may nakakasama... I was dumbfounded. Aki was referring to my brother (to followers of my blog, my sister Claudine) who that time was surrounded by boys (it was his birthday anyway). I knew what Aki meant. And Aki knew I was offended. He backtracked. Sabagay di mo naman kailangan...  

Yes, Aki. I don't need drinking buddies. Heck, I don't need a man.

Two, I asked a friend about another friend who's leaving Manila to work abroad. Giving too much info, he narrated, Nagpadespidida nga, hindi ka nagpunta, nagpunta kapatid mo kasama niya boyfriend niya. Oooops, now a boyfriend. My brother ( my sister Claudine) has a boyfriend. Suddenly this weird feeling.

Yes, this weird feeling. Heck, my brother has a boyfriend and I never had one in my entire life. 

I am turning 47 in September and I never had a boyfriend.

(Can someone please send me a big hug?)

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